<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?><rss version="2.0"><channel><title>Adoption Network</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog</link><description>Adoption Network</description><ttl>30</ttl><language>en-us</language><pubDate>Thu, 17 May 2012 21:33:34 +0000</pubDate><item><title>Inevitability </title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Inevitability.aspx</link><description>When my adoptive mom, Jewell, died in 1982 I was emotionally devastated and grief stricken. The loss of my dad four years earlier had been traumatic, but I had my mom to take care of and we grieved together. With her death I felt absolutely alone in the world, and for the first time, was aware there was no longer a safe-haven where I would be loved, protected and taken in no matter what. I was fortunate to have Diane, who became my wife one year later, for help, support and comfort.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Ten years later, when I first considered search and reunion, one of my first thoughts was that I might have to grieve for another mother. Partly to protect myself from the inevitable, I had said to my therapist, Vikki, “I’m not looking for another Mother!” During the next couple of years, as I attended ANC general meetings and an adoptee only group lead by Dottie Klemm, it occurred to me that I was already grieving for the loss of her. What was missing was the possibility of joy, love and healing: nothing to lose. I found Margaret in 1994 and we reunited on my 48th birthday.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
At 3:40 PM, January 20th, 2011 Margaret passed away with her children, grandchildren and several great-grandchildren at her bedside. We wept for her, for ourselves, and for each other. We made promises out loud and silently, held each other, and felt the swirling emotions of devastating loss and unconditional love. I thought about my two moms, Margaret and Jewell, and my fears about this moment. During my last few hours with Margaret I talked to her, hoping that through the fog of coma she could hear me. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
I thanked her for my life and her courage and our reunion. I reminded her of the lonely night she spent in labor with me 65 years ago, and the miracle of reunion that allowed us to be together on this, her last night.  Jewell would be glad about that. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
For the second time, Diane has helped hold me together as the mourning unfolds, and there are my sister and brothers, nieces and nephew, aunt and uncles with whom to share the experience. Instead of the emptiness and loneliness of the past, there are many safe havens; people who once again will take me in no matter what. The grief, sorrow and tears are familiar, but are tempered by the years of joy and laughter we had together, and the future we have created.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
As the 25th Anniversary of ANC approaches, I think about how I was gently and lovingly coaxed through the paralyzing fear and anxiety and was led to Margaret. The General Meetings and Adoptee Only groups have become safe havens where I can support and be supported by others who understand. It is time to reminisce, acknowledge,appreciate and celebrate the organization and the people who are Adoption Network Cleveland.</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Inevitability.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Inevitability.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Mon, 14 May 2012 21:06:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Follow Up Essay to May Newsletter Cover Story</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Follow-Up-Essay-to-May-Newsletter-Cover-Story.aspx</link><description>Preface:&amp;nbsp;
Twenty year old, Roxanna, an adoptee wrote this essay as a follow up to her "Reflections in the Mirror" story that was published in our May-June 2012&amp;nbsp;&lt;em&gt;Guidance&amp;nbsp;&lt;/em&gt;Newsletter.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;hr /&gt;
I wanted to pull my non-fiction piece to the front of my portfolio because I feel it gave me the most trouble. But, now after having done my final revision, I think it might be my best piece of writing. As I said in my reflection, I chose to write about a very personal topic: my adoption. I struggled for a couple of weeks trying to figure out what exactly I wanted to say about that topic. I knew I didn’t want the piece to become a feel-good essay on family. I wanted the piece to accurately display my own mixed emotions on this subject. And, mixed emotions arising from the fact that I’ve just started my personal exploration into this topic as an adult—not as a child intellectually understanding the concept of adoption, and therefore not being able to verbalize the emotional depth but, as an older person who is understanding what that means to everyone involved.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
I think the main reason the piece gave me trouble was that I felt very emotional towards my subject. I’m just beginning to understand my unique situation and it’s been a painful journey. And, I felt to do justice to the subject that I needed to have some emotional distance. I wanted to be able to tell the story and let the story speak for itself. I think its universal appeal lies in that it is about family and what binds us together. And, I wanted that universality to come through without me telling the reader.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Several weeks ago, I was working on my “Reflections in the Mirror” piece and I thought that I’d never find a way to revise it, or that I’d have to start from scratch. So, I started my revision project by taking out extra meaningless words and phrases just to tighten up the writing. Then, I slowly brainstormed about the tone I wanted overall for the writing. I wrote down what came to mind—not inhibiting myself and from there was able to find the voice I wanted. I also read some pieces by other adoptees telling their stories and it helped me to find what moved me and also showed me how they approached their stories.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
After revising it, I read the story aloud to myself. I think this is the single most important step in writing that I’ve taken this semester. I usually don’t read my stuff out loud, but I recently had to write transfer applications essays as well as stories for class and this has proved to be invaluable as a way to self-evaluate.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Lastly, I had my mother read it. It was wonderful to see her reactions to the piece. I wanted the piece not to just speak to adopted persons, but to adoptive families, and even birth families. I think I succeeded in finding the common link. What I feel is most important in writing and thinking about my essay is that I was able to put down on paper how I feel. I was able to explore those feelings and not keep them bottled up inside. I’m hoping one day to write a novel having to do with the effects of adoption and in particular transracial adoption. It’s a complex subject that is not black and white (no pun intended..!), and I don’t think it even gets covered enough within the adoption community. So, it feels quite liberating to talk about my experience—as I hope it can help others in the same unusual yet very unique circumstance. Being the product of two very different kinds of love, crossing cultures, and nations is what has made me into who I am, and maybe that’s all that matters. &lt;/div&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Follow-Up-Essay-to-May-Newsletter-Cover-Story.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Follow-Up-Essay-to-May-Newsletter-Cover-Story.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Tue, 01 May 2012 17:22:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Questions from A Birthmother to Birthfathers</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Questions-from-A-Birthmother-to-Birthfathers.aspx</link><description>I am curious about the birthfather's perspective within the story of adoption. We hear so little from them. So I ask these following questions to the birthfathers. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
What were your thoughts when you first discovered your girlfriend was pregnant?  Who made the decision to place your baby for adoption?  Was abortion legal at that time and was it ever considered?  Were you too young to support having a baby?  &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Did your parents know about the pregnancy?  Were they the ones who made the decision for you?  Did your girlfriend’s parents know you? Did they know your family? Did her parents tell you to never see your girlfriend ever again?  How did that make you feel? What did you do?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Were you allowed to “be there” for your girlfriend when she went through the pregnancy, the delivery, the adoption? Did you sign the papers, too?  Was your name on the birth certificate?  &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Or were you one of the birthfathers who “walked away” like so many did claiming no responsibility for their part in impregnating their girlfriend. Was that you?  How did it feel?  Tell us your side. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
And there are those who do not even know they have a child somewhere out in the world because they were never even told. Is that fair to them?  Do they have a right to know?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Did you ever question your girlfriend and ask her if she was sure that you were the father?  How did she respond to you?  Tell us how you felt then. What did you think about?  Did you love your girlfriend or was she simply someone you dated briefly?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
How do you feel about the birthmother today?  Is she a part of your life?  Has she been in your life since the adoption?  Did you marry her?  Did you marry someone else?  Did you tell your wife about your “other child” before you married her?  How about other children... did you have more children? Did you tell them about their sibling living out there somewhere? Did you think about your baby over the years?  Did you wonder how they were, who they had become?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Have you had a reunion with your adult child?  Who searched, you or the birthmother or your child?  What kind of a reunion do you have?  Do you see your son/daughter regularly?  Do you talk to your family members and/or friends about your child?  How do they respond when they hear you are a birthfather?  Are they happy for you or do they judge you?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Are you aware of the pain and sadness the birthmother went through after relinquishing your baby?  Do you ever wish you could have kept your baby?  Have you ever felt you weren’t “man enough” to step up and handle the situation differently even though you were probably very young at the time? Were you scared?&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
I hope some of these questions and comments will inspire birthfathers to share their story I want to hear more about the birthfather’s side to help me understand another part of this complicated process called adoption.</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Questions-from-A-Birthmother-to-Birthfathers.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Questions-from-A-Birthmother-to-Birthfathers.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Tue, 17 Apr 2012 20:19:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Taking Back Our Powers</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Taking-Back-Our-Powers.aspx</link><description>Back in the day, Saturday morning was all about cartoons . . . I’m talking about before Nickelodeon, before Cartoon Network, and before Disney Kids.  Cartoons happened exactly once a week, on Saturday mornings.  By lunch time, they were over, and it was another week before you could see your favorite animated characters battling evil, plotting to take over the world, or just generally causing mayhem.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;div&gt;&amp;nbsp; &lt;br /&gt;
Personally, I was always a big fan of super hero cartoons. I couldn’t wait to see how they would save the world this week.   One that I remember particularly (as will most of my generation, no doubt) is the Wonder Twins.  Not only were they super heroes, but they were teenagers, and twins – a boy and a girl.  He could turn in to any form of water, and she could turn in to any animal.  (You’d be surprised how much they managed to accomplish this way!)&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
I can hear you as you’re reading this – what on earth does this have to do with adoption?  There was one catch for the Wonder Twins . . . they had to be together in order to access their powers . . . “Wonder Twin Powers – Activate!”&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&amp;nbsp; &lt;br /&gt;
Loss of power is a core issue in adoption – for all members of the triad.  At some point in the adoption process, everyone involved has been powerless – a child powerless to stay with a mother; a couple powerless to have a biological child, or powerless to affect the whims of an agency; a birth mother powerless to raise a child well with no support from family or society.  Whether we are powerless in reality, or powerless in our own perceptions, each of us feels that loss of power and it impacts multiple domains of our lives.  It is as if we are one of the Wonder Twins, and without the piece we’ve lost, we can no longer access our power.&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
So the question becomes, how do we take it back?  This topic has come up in several contexts in the past few weeks, all in relation to adoption in some way.  For some, the search and reunion process is a way to take back that power – to literally find the missing piece.  One remarkable woman I met through the Birthmother’s support group at ANC (Shameless plug – it’s an AWESOME group of women!), told us that she has taken back her power by “being a birthmother out loud”, which is a foreign concept to me, but certainly seems freeing, and like something I should try.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&amp;nbsp; &lt;br /&gt;
For me, right now, I think it’s this – being able to put words to the feelings . . . to share them with others who might read and understand.  It’s being willing to stand up and say “I am an adoptee, and I am a birthmother, and there is no shame here.  I am more than these two experiences . . . and good, bad, or otherwise, they have made me strong.”  I know that these are just baby steps.  But they are important ones.  Slowly, I will take back my power, and I will be whole.  Will you come with me?  We each have to follow our own path, but we can take the journey together.  We can take back our power.  And then, watch out world!&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Wonder Twin Powers – Activate! &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Taking-Back-Our-Powers.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Taking-Back-Our-Powers.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Wed, 04 Apr 2012 15:09:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>A Good Mom</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-Good-Mom.aspx</link><description>Over the past week, I’ve had people tell me I was a good mom . . . not only to my daughter (who is 10 going on 35), which I’ve heard before, but to my son.  Someone told me again today, and it made me cry.  I was 18 when I “made an adoption plan” for my son (that’s what they say now).  At the time, I was choosing the family who would raise him instead of me.  Over the years, I’ve had people tell me that I did a wonderful thing for him, and I’ve had people tell me that I gave him a gift.  But never before has anyone said I was a good mom.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;div&gt;&amp;nbsp; &lt;br /&gt;
He’s twenty-three now, and two weeks ago, I reached out through a letter to my son’s mom.  Because I’m adopted myself, I understand what it’s like to have questions, and to want to know where you came from.  . . . and I thought that he was probably old enough to deal with the complicated answers to the likely questions, and that if he wanted those answers, he deserved to have them . . . and I thought that maybe now it would be okay for me to know him without creating any more issues for him than I already had.   That’s what I &lt;em&gt;thought &lt;/em&gt;. . . what I &lt;em&gt;knew &lt;/em&gt;was that in his life, she’s the one who has done all the hard work.  She’s the one who was there for the “firsts” . . . and for the celebrations, and the challenges, and the struggles.  And she deserves my respect.  She deserves better from me than for me to go around her to try to establish a place in my son’s life.  So when I felt that it was time to reach out to him, I knew that what I needed to do was to reach out to her first.  It just seemed right.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
I spent weeks very carefully crafting the letter . . . it was the most important one I had ever written.   I wanted to make sure she understood that I knew she was his mom, and that I didn’t expect anything from her, or more importantly from him.  I wanted to make sure she knew that I was adopted too, and I understood what that meant, and that because of that, I wanted him to have any answers that I had to give.  I also wanted to make clear that any further contact was her choice . . . because she’s his mom.  She knows him.  She knows what his questions are (if his has any), and she knows what he needs.  She knows if this is a good time for him to deal with these issues, or if this needs to wait because of other circumstances that I know nothing about.  And I wanted her to know that I know she loves him, and knows what’s best for him.&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Two weeks ago, I mailed that letter.  And three days after that, I received an email from my son.  Communication has been slow and gradual, which is what he wants, and I agree that it’s for the best.  And we’ll see where things go from here.  But for today, people think I’m a good mom to him . . . not just twenty-three years ago, but two weeks ago, and today.  And that means more to me than words can express.  To them, I’m not just his birthmother.  I’m a good mom.&lt;/div&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-Good-Mom.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-Good-Mom.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Wed, 07 Mar 2012 16:13:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Thank you Adoption Network Cleveland Donors!</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Thank-you-Adoption-Network-Cleveland-Donors.aspx</link><description>What a wonderful, crazy start to the year it has been for Adoption Network Cleveland and our fund raising efforts! &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Our fiscal year begins in October so for the Development Office that is the beginning of our “year.” And it always kicks off with our November mailing. This mailing is a chance for us to share a story of how your support has directly impacted someone or some family. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Each time the donations start coming in I am continually blown away by the generosity of our supporters. With each gift, you are saying that you value the work we do enough to give us some of your hard-earned dollars to support the families and youth who are touched by adoption and foster care. And this year’s generosity was so much more than we expected – thank you! &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
And then the launch and successful completion of the Groupon fundraising campaign in just four hours! What made this campaign unique was that not only was it time sensitive (we had three days to raise a minimum of $360) but it was also all done via social media. We had to rely on the word of mouth of our members and those on our email list. And your commitment to those we serve was evident the moment those numbers starting ticking up around 8 a.m. on the first day. And the gifts kept coming in even after the goal was met. In the end we raised over $1,000 – all of which will go toward a fabulous slumber party for 12 girls who otherwise may not have ever experienced this teenage rite of passage.&amp;nbsp;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”&amp;nbsp;&lt;br /&gt;
&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;-Winston Churchill &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
I think that quote best sums up what the support of our donors means to the families and youth who are helped through Adoption Network Cleveland. Our families, youth, adult adoptees and birthparents get important questions answered, make life-long connections and find a community that understands their unique needs. They add pieces to their lives that were missing before and our donors become a part of the fabric of those lives through their support; even though they may never meet that birthmother who has reunited with her birthchild or that 16-year-old girl who joins a forever family – nevertheless, a life has been made. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
So, thank you again for all that you do and for all you have done. We couldn’t do it without you! &lt;br /&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Thank-you-Adoption-Network-Cleveland-Donors.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Thank-you-Adoption-Network-Cleveland-Donors.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Tue, 14 Feb 2012 15:42:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Letter to Executive Director Betsie Norris</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Letter-to-Executive-Director-Betsie-Norris.aspx</link><description>&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;Dear&amp;nbsp;Betsie,&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;I
just wanted to thank you and&amp;nbsp;tell you how much I appreciate Adoption
Network Cleveland sponsoring the Adoptee Journey series for adult
adoptees.&amp;nbsp; I think this is such an important program and comes at the
right time for so many adult adoptees!&amp;nbsp; There should be a program like
this available in more communities and around the country.&amp;nbsp; I know there
are others out there like us who would genuinely benefit from a similar program
if only given the opportunity.&amp;nbsp;&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;Adoption
Network Cleveland is really on the forefront with this program in terms of
meeting the needs of a group of adult adoptees that have never been addressed.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;After
my birthmother essentially denied my existence, I was lost. The Adoptee Journey
program made me realize that the feelings I was having were normal and ok and
that I was not alone.&amp;nbsp; Everything we have discussed has affirmed my
existence as an adult adoptee and that I'm not nuts and I don't need
therapy!&amp;nbsp; It's ok to think and feel the way I do and I'm really ok.&amp;nbsp;
I've been able to discuss things in this group that I never felt comfortable
talking about in my own family (for fear of hurting their feelings, not their
reaction).&amp;nbsp; I now look forward to the monthly sessions, and consider
myself fortunate to be able to attend.&amp;nbsp; The people in the group have
become extended "family" to me and truthfully, I can't imagine not
having this group!&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;I
just wanted to thank you again and let you know what a difference in my life
this group has made!&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;Betsy
G.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Letter-to-Executive-Director-Betsie-Norris.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Letter-to-Executive-Director-Betsie-Norris.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Fri, 03 Feb 2012 16:45:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>The Inside Scoop on the Groupon Campaign</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/The-Inside-Scoop-on-the-Groupon-Campaign.aspx</link><description>As the Groupon kickoff draws closer, we thought it was important to give you some more information about what exactly will be going on between Jan. 31 and Feb. 2. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Adoption Network Cleveland has been chosen by &lt;a href="http://www.groupon.com/g-team"&gt;G-Team&lt;/a&gt;, the philanthropic arm of Groupon, to participate in a program that will allow people who receive the Cleveland, Akron-Canton or Youngstown Groupon Daily Deal to make a donation to support our &lt;a href="http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/announcements.aspx?newsid=15"&gt;Girls’ Night In &lt;/a&gt;program (If you don’t receive them, you can &lt;a href="http://www.groupon.com"&gt;sign up here&lt;/a&gt;). &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
On the daily deal email you receive on those days, you will also have the opportunity to make donations in $10 increments to buy goodies bags with $30 of personal care items for each girl in foster care who participates in the sleepover. So, what is the big deal about that? &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Youth in foster care can only sleep in homes that are county-approved foster care homes. That can make it hard to do something as simple as spend the night with a friend. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
The Girls’ Night In program will provide a group of girls with the opportunity to spend the night at the Adoption Network Cleveland offices and watch movies, eat popcorn and do all the other stuff girls do at a slumber party. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
However, there is an important thing to know about this Groupon promotion. &lt;strong&gt;We must get at least 36 people to donate at least $10 (that’s $360) to get any money&lt;/strong&gt; – this is called the tipping point model. Groupon and Adoption Network Cleveland want to ensure the money you donate has an impact so we have set a minimum amount to be raise that will ensure the money has an effect. If we don’t reach the goal, you don’t get charged – but we want to make sure we reach the goal! &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Also, this is important too…&lt;strong&gt;100% of the money you donate goes to the program&lt;/strong&gt;. You give us $10 – we get $10 to purchase the goodie bags of personal care items for the girls. Groupon will pay for all the processing fees associated with your donation. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Sounds easy, right? Well it is, but there is one more thing we need…you and everyone you know. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
We need you to spread the word about this campaign. We need you to tell, tweet and Facebook your friends, family and random people you meet on the street to watch the Groupon Daily Deals between Jan. 31 and Feb. 2 and make a donation to the Girls’ Night In program. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
The deal to make a donation won’t be available for donations until Jan. 31 and we will be sending out information between now and then to remind you to donate. The deal will typically appear in the bottom right corner of the daily deal so that is where you need to look. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Thank you for your support of this important program and we look to have a wildly successful campaign to support the Girls’ Night In program. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/strong&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/The-Inside-Scoop-on-the-Groupon-Campaign.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/The-Inside-Scoop-on-the-Groupon-Campaign.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Wed, 25 Jan 2012 18:23:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>My Own Christmas Box</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/My-Own-Christmas-Box.aspx</link><description>My Own Christmas Box&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
I am an adoptive mom. An oh-so-proud adoptive mom … I feel like a mom in every way to my only child Eric, who is almost 20 years old. My love for him spills over and oozes sometimes so much that I am regularly teased about it from co-workers at Adoption Network Cleveland and my family, too. And, Eric just smiles when I get mushy with him. He knows his mom. He knows my appreciation that I am &lt;em&gt;his&lt;/em&gt; mom.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
This holiday season has been a challenging one and it has brought forward feelings that I’ve never had before … and has brought to the surface some feelings that have been long locked in a box. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
On Monday November 14th, Eric left for 13 weeks of Marine boot camp in Parris Island, South Carolina. No phone or email conversations until we see him in Parris Island for graduation in February. We’ve shared amazing letters back and forth, but we’re only halfway through this first extended time apart. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
This separation from him has been enlightening to me. It’s brought his birthmother to my heart in a new and deeper way. We’ve all known her these 20 years with our open adoption, and I’ve known and felt her sadness, yet I didn’t feel the magnitude of it until now. This separation is hard stuff. It rips at the soul. It doesn’t feel right. Something is wrong with the universe. Families should &lt;em&gt;at least&lt;/em&gt; be together at the holidays.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Yet, I’ve been doing a good job keeping these feelings shoved down and locked into a box. To have them out in the open is too hard. Tears might come. Or worse. I often have wondered all these years why his birthmom hadn’t joined a group of other birthmoms to talk about her feelings. Now, I know. That involves going to that box and opening it. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
On Christmas Eve, something surprising happened. I was with a relative who is experiencing infertility and when I started to talk to her about knowing the feeling of facing another holiday without a baby, the tears came. It’s the first time since November 14th that I have allowed myself to do that. I was catapulted back to 1990 when I was in depths of infertility sadness. Then immediately, back to today – thinking, “My God, it’s Christmas and I can’t see or talk to or hug my baby.” What the heck? I am healed from infertility. And, I thought I’ve been doing so well with Eric away. (Writing him daily has helped keep me sane.) But, yet, where are these tears coming from? Then it dawned on me. I’ve been healed from infertility but I am not healed from knowing how to deal with separation. And, here I was in front of an open box. At least, while I was with that relative, I felt safe. Together, we shared tears. I cried for her facing another holiday without a baby and she for me, facing my first holiday in 20 years without my boy.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
When Eric’s birthmom and I have talked about him joining the Marines and being away from both of us, I shared with her how her years of separation from him is affecting me in a whole new way. I said that I have a new appreciation for how hard it’s been on her. Her response surprised me. She said, “You’re not used to being separated from him. It’ll be harder on you.” Whew. Then, I imagined how hard it will be when we both see him in February for just a few short days and then, again, will have to say “goodbye for a while.” These next four years of his Marine commitment will have many hellos and goodbyes – much like the countless hellos and goodbyes his birthmom has endured with him over these 20 years. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
This revelation has brought big emotions to me this holiday season. Sure, I expected for it to be hard for these first 13 weeks of separation, but I didn’t expect the feelings to go so far and deep – and to have any connection to my adoption journey. I didn’t expect to approach those feelings long locked away. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Opening the box is good for healing, but for now, back inside you go …</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/My-Own-Christmas-Box.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/My-Own-Christmas-Box.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Wed, 28 Dec 2011 13:00:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>A time to be thankful for ... Volunteers!</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-time-to-be-thankful-for-Volunteers.aspx</link><description>This Thanksgiving, I want to take a moment to thank all of the volunteers of Adoption Network Cleveland…all the volunteers that are currently active and all the volunteers that helped contribute to make the organization what it is today!  As the volunteer coordinator, I have been privileged to work with you and get to know you on a more personal level. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
In the past year, 174 volunteers contributed 3,351 hours of service, valued at $71,000.  Although that is a really great statistic, it doesn’t really speak to what volunteers have actually done for the organization this past year.  We didn’t actually “save” that money because we didn’t have it to spend in the first place.  Instead, think of it like this—we were able to DO so much more with what we did have!&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Not only do I want to THANK everyone for every hour they have invested, I also want to recognize a few of the different ways in which volunteers have been able to help us accomplish MORE this past year.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Here are a couple of things we would never have been able to do without volunteers:&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
•	Permanency Champion Mentors built relationships with 43 youth in permanent custody waiting for adoption&lt;br /&gt;
•	General Support and Discussion Meeting Co-Facilitators touched the lives of 197 individuals impacted by adoption or foster care&lt;br /&gt;
•	Youth Activities Assistants allowed us to provide childcare for 139 families in our Adoptive Family Support Group&lt;br /&gt;
•	Search managers helped 36 adoptee/birthfamily searches through to completion&lt;br /&gt;
•	Bakers provided baked goods for over 50 programs&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
So, I just want to say…&lt;br /&gt;
Thank you for sharing your own stories and compassion&lt;br /&gt;
Thank you for reaching out to someone in need&lt;br /&gt;
Thank you for making the choice to give of your time&lt;br /&gt;
Thank you for all the times you went above and beyond&lt;br /&gt;
And thank you for all you have done to make Adoption Network Cleveland what it is today!&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Wishing you and your family all the best this Holiday Season!&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Sincerely, &lt;br /&gt;
Your Volunteer Coordinator&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
If you are you interested in volunteering with Adoption Network Cleveland, please call me at (216) 482-2312 to get started today!&lt;br /&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-time-to-be-thankful-for-Volunteers.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/A-time-to-be-thankful-for-Volunteers.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Tue, 22 Nov 2011 20:05:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>2011 Holiday Card Design Contest</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/2011-Holiday-Card-Design-Contest.aspx</link><description>&lt;span style="line-height: normal; font-size: medium;"&gt;
&lt;div style="padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 15px; background-image: none; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; text-align: left; word-wrap: break-word; background-color: white; font-size: 14px; width: 642px; float: left; line-height: 150%; min-height: 280px; height: auto !important;"&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11px;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 14px;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;CALLING ALL YOUNG ARTISTS!!&lt;/strong&gt;&amp;nbsp;The 2011 Adoption Network Cleveland Holiday Card Design Contest is ON. Any local adoptee or youth in foster care, age 18 and under, is eligible to enter. The chosen design will become Adoption Network Cleveland's 2011 Holiday Card. Final dimensions: 4.25 inches wide x 5.5 inches tall. Original can be made larger to reduce down.* Winter Theme: snow, house with snow, snowman, family in snow, etc.&amp;nbsp;Any media a&lt;span style="font-size: 14px;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;cceptable (crayons, markers, cut paper, etc.) for color reproduction. Deadline: Must be received by Friday, November 4, 2011. Please mail or deliver unfolded to: Adoption Network Cleveland, attn: Linda Schellentrager, 4614 Prospect Avenue, Suite 550, Cleveland, OH 44103. Please include artist information - current age with a brief background. *For a pdf template, send email to: Linda.Schellentrager@AdoptionNetwork.org&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;/span&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/2011-Holiday-Card-Design-Contest.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/2011-Holiday-Card-Design-Contest.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Tue, 25 Oct 2011 13:10:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>Legal Symposium on “Permanency Solutions”</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Legal-Symposium-on-Permanency-Solutions.aspx</link><description>&amp;nbsp;I attended the two-day “Permanency Solutions” legal
symposium in September as a staffperson from Adoption Network Cleveland, but I
also found it profoundly moving as an adoptive parent. Over 250 people who work
and live foster care and adoption issues every day attended, including social
workers, attorneys, court personnel, youth in foster care and foster and
adoptive families. While most of those
of us attending deal with foster care and adoption issues on a daily basis, having
the opportunity to discuss these issues across disciplines and with youth and
families who are directly impacted made the event extraordinary.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;Dr. Gerald P. Mallon offered the opening keynote on
“Unpacking the ‘No’ of Permanency for Older Adolescents” and told the story of
his adoption of his daughter when she was 38 (!) after he had known her for
several decades. Dr. Mallon is a
professor and executive director of the National Resource Center for Permanency
and Family Connections at the Hunter College of Social Work in New York
City.&amp;nbsp; His presentation made me think
about how adoption really is a lifelong journey, as we say around the Network.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;Another moving part of the symposium was a panel on “Portraits
of Permanency,” which showed some of the families that had been formed through Partners
for Forever Families (Adoption Network Cleveland is a partner on this
initiative, which is led by the Cuyahoga County Department of Children and
Family Services and funded by a federal Adoption Opportunities grant).&amp;nbsp;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;The thing that moved me most, however, was a new dramatic
piece entitled &lt;em&gt;Sometimes Hope Is Enough&lt;/em&gt;,
which was commissioned for the conference and presented by Karamu Theater.&amp;nbsp; The piece told the story of siblings that had
been separated by the foster care system and the dynamics that arose when they were
reunited at a funeral. It reminded me of
some of the dynamics that I feel when our kids have visits with their
birthfamilies (both our kids’ adoptions are open.) The piece was well-received by the audience
and will be presented in the community several times in the coming months.&amp;nbsp;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;On the second day the conference, there were workshops and breakout
groups that allowed participants to work across disciplines on case scenarios
and learn from others’ perspectives.
For me the symposium reminded me of my early involvement in
the Network, and how much I learned as an adoptive parent from hearing an adult
adoptee talk about what it was like to grow up in an adoptive family . . . what
was good and what could have been better . . . or listening to a birthmother
talk about her experience of placing her child for adoption and then now
knowing for years how the child was doing.&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;div&gt;I learned a lot at the Symposium from listening to the experiences of
youth on the verge of aging out of foster care. Some of the stories haunt me.&amp;nbsp; All
of them make me want to recommit myself to doing my best to finding permanent
connections for these youth.
&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Legal-Symposium-on-Permanency-Solutions.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/Legal-Symposium-on-Permanency-Solutions.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Mon, 17 Oct 2011 07:19:00 +0000</pubDate></item><item><title>New Website</title><link>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/New-Website.aspx</link><description>&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;We have worked hard (and much longer than we’d like to admit!) on this new website for Adoption Network Cleveland.&amp;nbsp; Basically, we were trying to accomplish three things in launching the new site:&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Make the website more user-friendly&lt;/strong&gt;—There’s new navigation on the left-hand side of the home page and across the bottom of every page that will help you navigate the site, no matter how you’re touched by adoption—whether you’re an adoptee, birthparent or family member, adoptive parent, prospective adoptive parent, foster youth or alumni, or professional.&amp;nbsp; We hope you this helps you find the resources you need.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Make the website look and feel like the Adoption Network Cleveland “brand”&lt;/strong&gt;—When Linda Schellentrager joined the staff three years ago as Communications Manager, she established a fresh new look for all of our materials and we adopted a new slogan: “Adoption is a lifelong journey.&amp;nbsp; We are here every step of the way.”&amp;nbsp; Launching a new website gave us a chance to integrate that message into the website . . . you’ll see the message and our blue swoosh across the top of every page, in fact!&amp;nbsp;&lt;strong&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Integrate social media&lt;/strong&gt;—Social media have really changed the way we communicate in the past several years, and we’ve been trying to use the power of Facebook and Twitter to raise awareness about adoption and foster care as well as the programs and services that we provide.&amp;nbsp; You will find Facebook and Twitter icons in the top right corner of every page of our website.&amp;nbsp; If you haven’t already, we hope you’ll friend us on &lt;a href="http://http://www.facebook.com/AdoptionNetworkCleveland?ref=ts"&gt;Facebook&lt;/a&gt; and follow us on Twitter &lt;a href="http://twitter.com/#!/AdoptionNetCle"&gt;@adoptionnetcle&lt;/a&gt;.&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;We hope the new website makes Adoption Network Cleveland even stronger, and that this blog will help us stay connected even more.&amp;nbsp; Let us know what you think!&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p class="MsoNormal"&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/p&gt;</description><guid>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/New-Website.aspx</guid><category>General Posts</category><comments>http://www.adoptionnetwork.org/blog/post/New-Website.aspx#comments</comments><pubDate>Mon, 17 Oct 2011 07:05:00 +0000</pubDate></item></channel></rss>
