When Jeannette decided to become an adoptive parent eleven years ago, she knew she was prepared to become a mom. What she couldn’t have known was that less than a year after she adopted her son at birth she’d get a phone call asking if she’d consider adopting his brother at birth as well. “I told them not to make any decisions until I called them back – I figured it was something I shouldn’t just say yes to on the phone,” Jeannette said, though she already knew what her decision would be. Going from one child to two in such a short timeframe could be daunting enough for any parent, but for Jeannette, she knew that keeping her sons together was for the best.
The reality remains, though, that her family may look different from others. She is a white woman, her sons are Black. Both of her sons are neurodivergent and have ADHD. Because of these factors, Jeannette says she is more keenly aware of how her family is seen in public spaces. “You don’t always notice how much race factors in until you’re out somewhere and notice someone staring at your family because your skin color doesn't 'match',” she shared.
Since connecting with programs and services at Adoption Network Cleveland when her sons were young, Jeannette has found her community. A teacher, she was first encouraged to attend an ANC gathering by adoptive parents of children at her school. “That first event I brought my sons to, it was just my family and the family who suggested I try the group out,” Jeannette recalled with a chuckle. “It turned out to be a great thing for my kids and me, though.” Attending family programs allowed for her children to meet and spend time with other families just like their own, something that builds confidence and reinforces normalcy for all of them.
Now, Jeannette refers to Adoption Network Cleveland’s Family Ties monthly in-person gatherings as her “Me Time.” These events include dinner and a chance for the parents to have their own support group time while the children participate in age-appropriate activities. “I have many wonderful friends and family members, who are very supportive but don’t have the same understanding of what it's like to raise adopted children -- but when I come to Family Ties, I feel completely supported and understood,” she said.
Jeannette describes her family’s experience as an onion with many layers and she feels most supported when in the Adoption Network Cleveland community because the other parents understand where she’s coming from, have had similar experiences, can offer empathy, and suggest ideas as well as other resources. Likewise, her experiences can be of support to others who might be entering phases with their kids that she’s already gone through.
It was while in conversation with another adoptive parent at Family Ties that Jeannette decided to take the leap to participate in the second round of a new Adoption Network Cleveland program offering called CONNECT. This 10-week series, offered virtually, is an evidence-based, trauma-responsive, attachment-based program for adoptive, foster, and kinship caregivers raising children ages 8–19 across Greater Cleveland. Jeannette knew about it when ANC staff were recruiting participants for the first go-round, but she was hesitant about the time commitment. She never quite forgot about the opportunity, though, and asked her fellow Family Ties attendee about how the workshop was going. When she heard positive feedback about the program, she knew she’d apply the next time the program was offered.
And just like that – she became part of the second cohort of parents. Even though she’d previously been concerned about the time commitment, she found herself looking forward to CONNECT program days. Through story-sharing with other parents, skill-building, and role-play activities, Jeannette felt more prepared with real life situations that would arise with her sons.
With her CONNECT sessions now completed, she has already had the opportunity to use skills she built in the program. “The role plays we did were especially helpful, like, oh, that’s how you can handle something like that,” Jeannette said. She added that program facilitators provided “cheat sheets” for the parents to have on hand for whenever scenarios like their role plays emerged. Jeannette shared that she’d recently been having a discussion with one of her sons that, in the past, might have resulted in an argument, but because she was able to utilize what she’d learned in CONNECT, conflict was avoided and the discussion remained peaceful. “It was incredible,” she shared. “I think even my son could tell the difference.”
One of the metaphors that stuck with Jeannette from CONNECT is that adoptive parents are a “safe haven/secure base.” She shared that one of her sons came home from school one day telling her about how a classmate had told him that he “wasn’t wanted” because his mother had placed him for adoption. She said that moments like that always catch her off guard and she must think quickly about how to respond and assure her son that he’s loved and supported. Even though she knows she is doing so, these fears and insecurities will emerge from time to time – healing from trauma is a lifelong process. Skills she learned in CONNECT have made her feel better prepared to support her children when such challenges emerge.
Jeannette has also participated in the monthly Transracial Adoptive Parent Support Group, which is held virtually during the lunch hour for parent-convenience. She finds the sessions useful and supportive. Additionally, she’s brought her sons to many of ANC’s Family Socials, giving them the opportunity to attend various community events as well as social events like pool parties. Jeannette made special note of a February 2026 outing to the Cleveland Museum of Art for Black History Month. “My son said, ‘I can make art like that?’” she told us. She said that he had never seen himself represented in art the way this exhibit did and it was important to him because he’s artistic. She said that because of her sons’ behavioral issues, she would have never felt confident enough to bring them to the art museum on her own but knew it would be OK going with an Adoption Network Cleveland-arranged group.
Jeannette is especially thankful for Program staff member, Janelle Poskocil, for many reasons. One, because Janelle is also a transracial adoptive parent herself and so she can relate easily to Jeannette’s own experiences. Janelle also offers support, comfort, and understanding that Jeannette deeply appreciates. “I was reading all of these books – like The Body Keeps the Score and other books like that... I was really getting deep in the weeds... and Janelle said to me, ‘Hey, maybe take a break from those kinds of books and read something else next,’” Jeannette told us with a laugh. Sometimes you need someone who not only has resources like that to recommend and share but also who knows when to tell you to set those resources aside and give yourself a mental break to absorb the information and focus on something else for a little while.
Jeannette shared that participating in Adoption Network Cleveland programs reassured her that she was “not failing” at being a parent. Being around other families and other parents who are going through what she’s going through has made all the difference for her.
We are so grateful to Jeannette for sharing her story with us – and so thankful she and her family have found such a meaningful community with us at Adoption Network Cleveland.
To learn more about the programs mentioned in this blog, please check out the following:
Family Ties: Family Ties & Youth Group | Adoption Network Cleveland
CONNECT: Adoption Network Cleveland Connect© Parenting Group
Transracial Adoptive Parent Support Group: Weaving Culture Transracial Family Group | Adoption Network Cleveland
To find out about upcoming Family Outings, check out our calendar: Adoption Network Cleveland Calendar of Events and Programs
Additional questions about Adoption Network Cleveland programs and services can be sent to our Director of Programs Ty Cliffel at ty.cliffel@adoptionnetwork.org.
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